Tag: love

The Importance of Wildlife Conservation and Kindness

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I love this frog! Will I kiss the frog, no … but it got me thinking ….

An American bullfrog

Here’s this frog in the middle of a parking lot. A distance from where I believe it should be! I would love to know where it is going. I will never know. Unfortunately I left the frog for a couple of minutes … plenty of time, obviously, for it to go its own way. Darn! I even looked for it. No success!

I love healthy wildlife. Wildlife is to be wild. This means the animal survives on its own without mankind sheltering or feeding it. Healthy wildlife will move and take care, ignoring mankind … and we get to enjoy wildlife at a distance. Those constructed wildlife bridges have been very helpful for wildlife to get across roads, for example.

I do feed birds at my feeders. Seed is out during the winter and when the birds migrate. Both are times when the birds can use the extra nutrition. Just as important is when people turn off their outdoor lights during bird migration time. I love seeing humans take action and care about a life, even a bird’s life!

I love humankind when kindness is actually in action. I believe people who care for wildlife care for humans too. Humans are not wild animals. They need shelter and food. With kindness we can help those in need. There are local agencies available to help those in need.Let’s be sure people who are in need do know what help is available. Sometimes it simply a kind, helping hand or providing guidance to an available agency. Services are available for veterans, youth, homeless and many needs … let’s connect people with what they need, just as we do when protecting wildlife!


Final Talks With My Best Friend … Life Will Go On …

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More than 2.5 years ago my best friend was dying. We both knew death was inevitable. We just were not sure how long the dying would take. My friend had a challenging last couple of years. She fought cancer through rounds of chemo, found extra bursts of energy when spending time with family and friends, and never seemed to feel sorry about herself while talking with others. I, on the other hand, was angry, sad, and not ready to lose my best friend for any reason, especially for one as permanent as death.

She and I talked often and about everything through our 40 shared years. Her divorce and our friendship were misconstrued by some. Her belief was: if anyone truly knew her, they knew the truth. She moved on with her law school acceptance and graduation and me with my various administrative school positions; we celebrated it all. Our travel opportunities, hikes searching for loons, and time at my Adirondack cabin were enjoyed by us. We discovered some people never knew/understood a deep love could exist between friends. At those times, we wished we were family instead. Apparently it was more acceptable to say “I love you” to a family member than anyone outside of that circle.

We both knew we had things to talk about at as her energy and time dwindled. I think I was more heart-broken about this all than her. She seemed to be in a better place understanding the finality of life than me. It may have been her final two years that forced her to look at life through a different lens than mine. I was always wishing for the next moment we would share, and yet knew it would probably not be.

And so when I spent the last weeks of her life with her, I knew it was time to talk. I wanted to know her latest feelings about some of the things I had been wondering about and would no doubt continue to wonder beyond her death. Our discussions involved close looks at the environment, family, friends, religion and whatever else came to us as we talked. Who, what, why and where? Respect, trust, love, likes and dislikes. Life seemed so complicated and so did our end-of-life discussion. How appreciative I was of having time to talk with my best friend just before she died. 

As I move on without my friend, I must realize how fortunate I was to have such a wonderful friend in my life … and that will always bring a smile to my face, a warmth in my heart, and tears in my eyes. I tell myself: life goes on … as she said it should. Remembering her birthday this month with fond memories, such as our pursuit of loons!

Four mile Adirondack hike brought us to a lake’s edge seeing some loons!:)

Memories ARE Wonderful!

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Last week would have been my dad’s birthday! Last month I would have been wishing my best friend and my dad every happy holiday in that month! But they are not here to share and enjoy the celebrations with me and my family. It makes me sad!

I don’t want to be sad. It just happens. I had the support and unconditional love from both my dad and best friend. I was fortunate. I was appreciative of them. One cannot help but wonder how things would be if they were both still here. I also always hope they knew how much each was loved … and not just by me, but so many family and friends!

Death is so darn permanent, but memories are not! I hold many memories! 

Recently I was thinking how my dad would discuss with me how I should tackle a rusty gate at my home. We would also bemoan the Homeowner’s Association needing to report “rust on a gate” to me, like I hadn’t noticed it. Do we really think it dropped my house-selling value? And now I wait for the right air temperature during winter to paint the gate … I mean really !??!

Whenever I take a walk/hike, memories of my best friend flood into my head. The joy was our discussion of everything! For forty years we talked about so many topics I cannot think of one we did not talk about! Nowadays we are guarded, yet that was never the case with my best friend. 

I know this next statement may strike you strange, but sometimes we still do talk! I can picture my dad and friend, each standing alone, and sometimes standing together, as they had done at various times through the years, as we talk. I ask my dad, what would he do in a particular situation and I ask my friend, what does she think about such-and-such. Memories seem to flood into my head and help me think what each might say to me. They were always kind. They usually asked questions of me so that I may actually solve my own issue. Interesting how that process seems to continue even as I talk with them now. 

I love memories and will hold them dear forever! Thank you dad and best friend! 

What Were My Dad’s Answers To Me?

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My Dad had an answer for most questions asked of him. As head of household, parent, spouse, educator, intelligent person, I figured he knew when best to provide an answer to any of my questions, or not. I have always wondered what his answer was for each of three questions I had asked him during my lifetime. While my memory fades in my later years, I truly do not think I was ever given an answer to these three questions.

First: We traveled around the USA as a family one entire summer. The station wagon carried family members, our collie, and pulled a camper, which I saw the backend of each time we took a hairpin turn in the mountains. While driving through the Mohave Desert, my question to my Dad, who used to teach driver’s education, was about a driver’s responsibility. “Dad, if we arrive at a red stop light here in the middle of the desert and no other person is driving a car for miles around or stopped at the intersection in the middle of the night, do we have to wait for the light to turn green?” I always believed intelligent people can determine an outcome especially when others are not around to interfere or cause a conflict. To this day, I do not recall an answer from him. So I have been left to believe I am smart enough to do what I think is best for the moment and will someday know if I think differently when I drive in a desert in the middle of the night and have to stop at a red light.

Second: As the oldest child in my family, I was always reminded by my parents there was no handbook on how to be the perfect parent. Alas, I was to follow their rules. I just want to say, my younger siblings got away with more than me as years passed by. Fortunately with our age differences I was glad to not be around to see the inconsistencies in the house rules. I remember one day my Dad said to me, when you turn 18 years of age plan to either move out or pay rent here. Well that was an interesting comment, have they now just read a book on parenting? My question to my Dad, who I knew loved me, was “If I have to pay rent any place, why would I pay it to stay here?” I guess it seemed a rhetorical question since it was never answered. My moving out and getting on with an independent life was an accomplishment which to this day is why I am self-reliant. Okay, thank you for that.

Third: My Dad helped paint my white house as I was to move to another school district for a new job. My Dad also painted the handles of his work tools so he could identify them as his. Blue is my favorite color, so my question to him was, “Why do you always choose the color red?” I wanted the house to be white, yet he painted the shutters red convinced the house would sell faster. When I asked the buyer, they said they loved the red shutters! Wow! Also, I know which are his tools because they have red handles … honestly, I am not a fan of that color … but it never stopped me from borrowing and using his tools.

So despite not getting answers to all of my questions and my Dad having passed, I have been left with some fascinating memories. That’s life isn’t it … not always getting the whole story about everything you want when you think you should have it! Love you Dad; another lesson learned!

Love is Carried on the Wind

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My sister, mom and friend celebrate September birthdays and I am physically thousands of miles away from them. I don’t speak of love 365 days a year, but I would hope each knows my heart feels for them everyday.

My daily routine includes meditative moments where I send positive energy. Most recent for my sister, mom and friend I hope my positive energy radiates to each of you for your day’s activity to be somewhat eased or your personal struggles to be lessened. When we live in the moment of hope and positivity a birthday celebration can be enjoyed with all near and far.

Think of my love being carried on the wind and you are wrapped around on all sides by that wind; that is my loving hug to you as you celebrate your special day. Live in that moment and know you are loved. Happy birthday!

My Dad on Father’s Day

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I am not a shopper. I usually need to ask someone where to buy a particular item. There are stores I have never set foot into, and I am okay with all of this. But lately I feel overwhelmed with “What to give dad for Father’s Day” ideas in the few places I frequent: coffeeshops, gas stations, restaurants.

I am not shopping for a card or gift this year for my Dad. He died last October. Why is it this year there are gift and card ideas always in my face when I do not need anything? I used to work hard in finding the right and best card for my Dad. I struggled figuring out what would be the best gift for him because I always believed he got what he wanted himself. Yet, I eventually did find card and gift and send it off in time for Father’s Day.

My Dad, on this date, while not physically present continues to be carried in my heart. I have written many a note to him in my mind, thanked him for the gifts he has given me all these years, and can only appreciate the fact he had been in my life for so many years!

Happy Father’s Day!